Tech as a tool of control: the new face of domestic abuse
Domestic abuse is increasingly taking a digital turn. A leading charity, Refuge, reports that perpetrators are using artificial intelligence, smart devices and online platforms to monitor, intimidate and manipulate women. This shift means abuse can happen every minute of the day, often far from the traditional sightlines of physical violence. The tech-enabled harassment can be personal, invasive and sophisticated, making it harder for survivors to seek help and to stay safe.
What kinds of tech are being used?
Experts describe a range of devices and tools that abusers exploit. These include:
- Smartwatches and fitness trackers that reveal location data, daily routines and health metrics to the abuser.
- Smart home devices that can be manipulated to control lighting, temperature, cameras or entry points, creating a sense of constant surveillance.
- Mobile apps and social media used for stalking, messaging pressure, or gaslighting through the manipulation of notifications and access to private information.
- AI-powered tools that can imitate voices or generate convincing but false content to coerce victims or co-workers and fear of exposure.
- Location-sharing features, cloud backups and device-connected ecosystems that provide a continuous feed for monitoring.
What distinguishes tech abuse is not just the presence of devices but how they are exploited to erode autonomy, privacy and safety. Abusers may use data minimisation and manipulation to present an image of concern while secretly tracking movements or communications.
Why tech-enabled abuse thrives in silence
Digital abuse often begins subtly, with controlling messages and monitoring of online activity. Victims may internalize blame or fear escalation, preventing them from reporting abuse. In some cases, survivors worry about losing their passwords or accounts, or about the abuser weaponising family photos or private videos. The COVID-19 pandemic amplified these risks, as more daily life moved online and people spent longer periods in close, technological proximity to their abusers.
Impact on physical safety and mental health
Surveillance-based abuse can lead to heightened anxiety, panic attacks, depression and post-traumatic stress symptoms. The constant feeling of being watched can reduce freedom of movement, hamper work, friendships and family life, and erode self-esteem. Digital threats can also affect financial security if abusers access bank apps, payment histories or shared services.
What survivors and communities can do
Refuge and other support services are urging a coordinated response that blends awareness, technology literacy and practical safety steps. Key recommendations include:
- Digital safety planning: Assess which devices are connected, review account security, change passwords, enable two-factor authentication, and limit shared access to sensitive data.
- Protection settings: Use privacy controls on social media and messaging apps; disable location sharing; carefully manage connected apps and third-party permissions.
- Data minimisation: Reconsider what personal information is stored in cloud services and who can access it.
- Evidence gathering: Document incidents with timestamps, screenshots and, when safe, keep a record of abusive communications to aid reporting.
- Support networks: Reach out to shelters, helplines and legal advisers who understand digital abuse and can help create a safety plan.
Legal and policy responses
Authorities are increasingly recognizing digital abuse as a legitimate form of domestic abuse. Policy discussions focus on updating laws to cover coercive control that is conducted online, improving digital safety education, and ensuring technology companies take responsibility for misuse on their platforms. Survivors should know that seeking help will not jeopardize their privacy; trained professionals can support risk assessment and safety planning without exposing victims or their families to further harm.
Getting help and staying safe
If you or someone you know is experiencing tech-enabled abuse, contact a domestic abuse charity such as Refuge for confidential advice and safety planning. You can also reach local helplines, healthcare providers or the police in emergencies. Remember: you are not alone, and you deserve safety, privacy and freedom from coercion—online or offline.
